Easter

Today was nice but very cold. I dressed the girls in their cute dresses atop turtlenecks and long sleeve shirts just so I could get a few cute pictures of them wearing them.

Billy had asked me if I wanted to go to the Peaks for breakfast but I declined. Seems so frivolous and wasteful to me to go out to breakfast. Money is always tight and I’d rather not waste it. The girls had fruit and peanut butter toast with honey while we ate really-bad-for-you-sausage gravy on toast that they don’t like.

Then we went outside to hunt Easter eggs. The girls had a blast even though we did it last night. We boycotted Aunt Mary’s annual get together and MIL lied to her that Billy had to work. I really don’t understand why she can’t just be honest and say we would rather keep things simple and small, start our own traditions. How is that wrong?

Billy found out Lowes was open and ran out to get the part he needed to fix the new vanity. It seems the faucet is now off center from the drain so we have a problem. Before he left I asked him if he could please just spend 10 minutes cleaning up our bedroom. I vacuumed the house and cleaned up Emma’s room.

Heck, I rarely ask him to help out with chores around here that are inside. His few chores include taking out the trash and taking it to the dump and cleaning the cat box. That’s it. I do 99.999% of household chores like a good housewife. *rolls eyes*

I notice he took off to Lowes and I thought wow, that was quick. I go in our bedroom and it’s still chaos. He didn’t even make the bed. For some reason this just enraged me.

When he got home I asked him why he couldn’t do the one thing I had asked? He got all defensive and said he wanted to get the part and hurry back. I’m so angry at this point and I actually used some very very BAD language while the girls were in the room.

Man, I feel so bad about that but he makes me so mad sometimes I swear I could go beat him! I didn’t apologize – here it is Easter – in fact, I went into the bathroom while he was working on the faucet which he still could not fix after the trip to Lowes to continue bitching at him about why he couldn’t even make the bed???

This man works hard. I’ll give him that. He pays all the bills. Yeah, he does that. It never occurs to him that being a mother is also a hard job and that maybe picking up a broom or a toilet brush without being formally invited to do so would be a great way to make me feel loved. It never registers.

To top this all off yesterday he went with me to the grocery store – we all went. I thought he would enjoy a chance to pick out some things he wants that I don’t usually buy. Well we each put a girl in the front of a cart and went about the store. I bought a turkey breast and placed it in his cart to keep it separate from some produce I had put in mine. He says to me, “I know what you are doing.” My face is blank and I have no idea what he means. “You are putting the expensive items in MY cart so I’ll pay for them.” OMG! You’ve got to be kidding me???? It’s all YOUR money. I don’t really have much of my own except what I make doing a party or two a month but damn, that’s spent already. This was GROCERIES for our family.

He swears up and down he was kidding. Yeah, right. And my hair is blonde and I’m 6 feet tall.

Later this afternoon, the ILs dropped by with a birthday present for me. A nice red crockpot that initially I was disappointed to learn was my gift. Reminded me of the iron I got for Christmas. However, they also gave me $50 cash! Also, the crockpot is really super nice. It’s red and looks so pretty against the blue walls in our kitchen. The inside comes out and you can wash it in the dishwasher AND it has a heat proof cover so you can tote it to potlucks! How awesome is that?

Even better, she made both girls sweet little Easter baskets that were exactly equal in content. That made me really happy. I felt bad for thinking evil thoughts about them yesterday and I was reminded of how things used to be when we all got along and were super close.

Tomorrow is my 33rd birthday. Hard to believe but the number sounds somehow lucky to me. I’m hoping this will be a great year and that this will be the year that I get back on track health wise and lose this weight. The eternal optimist, I keep thinking I will do it even though I have failed at it so many times over the last four years.